Baby Angels Blog

Saw this on ivillage, great advice.

We’re wary of child-minders who chain smoke, feel nervous leaving a baby at a noisy nursery, and our mothers are too busy trekking round Nepal. Henrietta Otley considers employing a nanny

I have two children and work freelance, but the daily round trip to the child-minder for the baby, and nursery for the three year old, doesn’t leave me enough time (or energy) to fit much work in during the day. I fantasise about being able to leave the house in the morning, handing over my half-dressed, un-breakfasted children to a punctual, smiling nanny. So when I stumbled across The Nanny Handbook (Karen House and Louise Sheppard – Simon and Schuster £12.99) in my local bookshop, I thought I could at least put my fantasy to the test, and see if this is a realistic childcare option for someone like me. Karen House and Louise Sheppard are management consultants and, between them, they’ve employed ten nannies, so they ought to know what’s what.

What does a nanny cost?

Finance is, rightly, top of the list of things to consider. A recent survey by Nannytax, the nannies’ payroll service, showed that they’re expensive. While it’s absolutely right that whoever looks after your children should be paid a decent wage, you want to make sure your earnings after tax aren’t completely eclipsed by the cost of your childcare. The average salary for a full-time nanny in the Home Counties is nearly £18,000; in London this rises to £22,000 plus perks, which can mean a car or even membership of the local gym. Elsewhere, nannies can expect a salary of around £15,000.

Is it really a nanny you want?

A nanny becomes more cost-effective, the more children you have; but some people just aren’t cut out for employing someone who’s based in their house. My friend Helen, a barrister with two small daughters, has given her nanny notice and is going back to child minders and nurseries, because she can’t cope with someone doing things differently in her home. For reasons she can’t articulate, it’s fine for her children to be elsewhere watching television and eating crisps, but she can’t bear to have them doing it at home. If you suspect you’re a control freak, you must learn to delegate responsibility to your nanny, or you’re going to make everybody’s life miserable.

Nanny shares

Many parents share a nanny very successfully with another family. It’s important to discuss details in depth with the other parents involved, and try to match yourself with people who have a similar approach to bringing up children. Karen House and Louise Sheppard say that, in their experience, this arrangement works best between friends rather than acquaintances.

Live in or live out?

This really depends on what you can afford, the size of your house, and how highly you value your privacy. While a live-in nanny is on site and on hand when you need her, it’s important for her and for you to have a clear understanding about what time is your time, and what time is hers for herself.

Finding a nanny

Think long and hard about the qualities and duties you want a nanny to fulfil. It’s a good idea to make a list. When things go wrong, it’s often because employer and employee have different expectations, and haven’t been clear with each other from the outset. Karen House suggests trying to find someone whose skill set compliments your own; she’s eternally grateful to the nanny who turned her sons into little artists, as she has no creative tendencies whatsoever.

Agencies make the job of finding a nanny easier, but they can be expensive; some charge a small finding fee, and others ask for a percentage of the nanny’s first year’s salary. There are now quite a few websites, some of which are free, where you can advertise for nannies or search a database of candidates. See:
Nanny job or Star nannies
Otherwise, you can advertise in local newspapers or magazines like ‘The Lady’: 020 7379 4717.

Interviewing

Vet applicants over the phone before inviting a select few round for an interview. When they come, try to get them to play with your children so that you can see them in action. Pay attention to your gut feelings about people. The most important thing is to be convinced that your children will be safe with the nanny, that she’ll establish a good relationship with them, and they’ll have fun together.

You must check all references for any nanny you’re thinking of employing

Phone all previous employers and check thoroughly. Karen House unearthed information about nannies who had stolen, flirted with husbands, gossiped about the family and even tormented the children.

Taxing matters

Don’t forget that if you employ a nanny, you’re responsible for paying her tax and national insurance. The paperwork this involves puts some people off, but Karen House and Louise Sheppard estimate that the process takes about 30 minutes every quarter. If you need help, there’s an employers help line for tax and national insurance queries: 0845 714 3143.

Once you’ve found her, how do you keep her?

It seems the key to a happy and enduring nanny-parent relationship is communication. This starts with a clear and realistic contract.

Key points to include in the terms and conditions:

• Job title, place of work, starting date
• Remuneration and any benefits
• Probationary period (usually a month)
• Hours of work
• Holidays (legal minimum is 4 weeks)

Expect the settling in period to be fairly stressful for all parties. Karen House found she had a lot of adjusting to do, when she employed someone else to look after her children at home. Once she came to terms with the notion that it would be better for everyone, if her children loved the nanny as much as they loved her, the household became a happier place. I’ll try and bear that in mind if I manage to find the right nanny and can earn enough money to pay her.

Useful contacts:

• Nanny Payroll Service (for employers) 01536 373111
• Nanny Share Network (for parents and nannies looking for shared childcare in and around London) 020 8516 5948
• Professional Association of Nursery Nurses (for information and advice on any aspects of employing a nanny) 01332 372 337

Saw this great article, thought i’d share it.

Your action checklist from the Daycare Trust
Visit several childcare providers before you decide who will help look after and educate your child.

Here are ten ‘Quality Pointers’ to look for:

are the children relaxed and do they seem to be enjoying themselves?
are the staff listening to the children and are they joining in with the children’s activities?
do the staff seem friendly and proud of their work?
is the building pleasant, clean and welcoming?
is there a fun and safe outside play space?
are different cultures positively represented in the toys, books and wall displays?
do children and staff represent the ethnic and cultural groups that live locally?
are there lots of fun toys and activities for children?
is the area child-centred - with child-sized furniture and with wall displays that children have made themselves?
are you and your child welcomed - by staff and by the children?
Try to visit when there are children around but also arrange a quiet time to discuss questions you want to raise.
Here are ten questions you can ask when you visit prospective childcarers:

how long have you been working with children?
have you done any training?
do you like this job? why?
what other children will be with my child? (for nurseries and playgroups: do you operate a keyworker scheme?)
how do you spend the day and how will the other children’s schedules fit with my child?
where will my child rest?
do you make outside visits and trips? where to?
what sorts of meals do you give the children?
can I see your registration certificate? (nannies are not registered)
do you keep records about the children’s progress? and how will we exchange information and communicate?

Other watch points:
Do

ask for at least two references from other parents and follow them up
prepare questions for your visit
organise a settling in period for your child before you go back to work
encourage your home-based carer to start a network of friends with children
equip a nanny to provide interesting play for the child - sand, paint, clay or dough and aprons for her and the child and show her local parks and children’s services
express your appreciation to your child’s carers
investigate further if your child appears unhappy with her childcarer or if she is not thriving. Acknowledge her feelings and seek advice from the childcarer or your health visitor or Under Eights Advisor in the local authority.
Don’t
forget looking after your child is a demanding and vitally important job
ignore a child’s difficulties if she seems unhappy
skimp on pay and conditions if you want to hold on to your nanny or childminder
For more information see The Daycare Trust website.
For information about childcare in your area see Childcare Link website.

Chat about choosing childcare on the Working Mums messageboard.